Off day

What a day, what a boring muthafucking day;

Woke up at 330pm.

Smoked.

Turned on my laptop.

Smoked.

Surfed Fb & started downloading shows to Pipi player.

Smoked.

Ate a humongous bowl of fried rice.

Smoked.

Nua until 9pm.

Smoked, smoked, smoked.

Geylang.

Smoked, smoked, smoked.

Home now.

Smoked.

What a way to spend my off day! Best, next off day in 6 days time, how marvellous.

Oh no, I burned out yesterday by sleeping 24hrs! Wtf! Saturday, the whole of a marvellous Saturday dedicated t my bed. >:(

Irritated with myself.

From Wednesday till now, I was intending to go manicure & pedicure but I just kept oversleeping everyday.

So now, my plans is to wait till 10am & accompany Mr Wong for his Class 2A practicals before heading over to Causeway Point for a new pairs of Heatwave heels, manicure + pedicure session & shop my whole Sunday away!

I dont want to waste my Sunday again!

Ok, I promise not to idle today away as my day was wasted yesterday! Angry, I didnt go paint my nails!

So today I shall be meeting Wang later, to paint our nails & then idle our time away together. (Lol, just pray that she wouldnt force me to go Henderson Wave again.)

()

I spent the whole night bling-ing my thumbdrive; Xiao Hei, sticking the Swarovski crystals one by one & got a sore back, epoxy glue all over my fingers as a result. But I'm so happy, its so blinky now. Omg, I just love naming & customising all my stuffs.

Most of my stuffs that I frequently use are being named, such as my lappy; Xiao Hong, my broadband; Xiao Qing, my iPhone; Xiao Ping & now my thumbdrive; Xiao Hei. I think I left a few names out bcos some of the items are not being used anymore. My previous stereo Bluetooth headset was Xiao Jing but was sent in for servicing and exchanged out for another model which I have not yet thought of a name for.

Yay, I know I'm slightly retarded but I like it!

Argh, I'm still not asleep! Its 4.23pm now & insomnia keeps hunting me. I can feel my eyes hurting from my lack of sleep for 24hrs, yet I toss & turn in bed all the like a whale while trying to fall asleep.

Its feels like I've no control over my mind from thinking & I'm mentally dead shit beat

Hopefully I'm able to at least wake up later on if I manage to sleep after this & be able to do my intended express manicure later in the late evening. I dont want to waste all my time sleeping & wake up to realise its 2am in the midnight. For the past 1 week that's how I've been idling my days away.

Nxt Monday I'll resume back to work, so hopefully the next 3 days could be spent in a more meaningful manner.

I feel so tired both mentally & physically! I smoke alot, I sleep in the reversed timings & I think alot.

Had a relieving talk with XXXXX last late night/ this early morning & I'm just so glad that I'm not alone. The guiltiness  indefinitely will stay with me forever but I've to learn to pick myself up & move on for the people who put in effort on me, for the ones who really care for me & of cos for myself.

Was so inferior to look into the mirror for the past few days, totally off the hook in my external appearance. Perhaps its a "conclusion" that I gave myself after the incident. I looked into the mirror and the gush of guilt, my mistakes, my end results & the "scars" all kept reminding me of everything.

For now, lemme just maintain my posture while on the route to moving on.

I may have sinned, but I'll repent & redeem. I may really feel upset, but I'll respond with courage. I may feel tired, but I still must maintain a positive mindset. I may feel lonesome, but I'll love myself more. For myself, to myself!

Recover!

Alright, shall lepak finish, toilet & try to sleep again. Or at least shut my mind down...

(Damn it, someone is using the loo! )

Tons of things tht I have t do, yet undone;

- Facial

- Manicure & Pedicure

- Replace the diamond that has fallen off from my old ring

- Revamping of my wardrobe

- Continue on my Sakyant tattoos ;Prolly start w/ one underneath my right wrist.

- Find a clock for my room

- Buy more shorts; I just cant find all my shorts!

- Cheap dark curtains

- Ikea for some cheap storage cupboards or whatsoever

- 9 sterling earrings; Best to be of those earrings for piercing so that the clasp wouldnt keep dropping

- Make new specs

- Save money into my OCBC & UOB accounts

Finally, a rough list where I'm also unable to misplace.

***

(Lamenting more...)